Dale Coyne Kills Two Birds with One Stone
After I declared the Series dead late last year, Dale Coyne Racing saved us by announcing that Milka Duno will run her first full season with the team. With this, he accomplishes both a return to the Series in 2010 and also gives the people on this thing we call the internet something to be negative about. You know, being negative is kind of the internet’s thing.
Immediately people are crying out that the fact that Milka has a seat and Graham Rahal doesn’t is the biggest injustice since OJ was indicted. When you think of it reasonably, though, you see the two are entirely unrelated, and that’s coming from one of the largest Graham Rahal fans you’ll meet.
Let’s think positively about Milka Duno and discuss the things Milka has not done over her career:
Milka Duno never hit a poor, defenseless bird.
Milka Duno never stole Pee Wee Herman’s bike.
Milka Duno never ran over Nigel Mansell’s head.
Milka Duno never crashed on a parade lap.
Milka Duno never dove into a pond before checking the water.
So let’s see…that makes Milka better than Scott Dixon (and Randy Johnson), Francis Buxton, Dennis Vitolo, Roberto Guerrero, Phillipe Gache, and some Scandinavian dude.
I said on twitter that if half the race winners last season were as fan-friendly as Milka, we’d be in a lot better shape. She may not be the best driver, but I’ve never met anyone at a race track who was there because anyone on Ganassi or Penske was outwardly kind to them at a race a number of years prior. I met an older couple at time trials last year who were in from out-of-town solely to support Milka.
Milka Duno, you’re ok by me.
March 4th, 2010 at 5:53 pm
Don’t forget Tom Sneva. The Gas Man crashed on a parade or pace lap one year at Indy too (1986?).
So far she hasnt’ crashed into the Turn One wall when trying to exit pit road either, which gives her a leg up on Paul Tracy.
I’d give her a twenty to run over Nigel Mansell’s head, or let me do it. That has to be on every race fan’s bucket list.
March 4th, 2010 at 10:49 pm
Maybe instead of being a race driver, she’d be better as Indy Car’s ambassador of fan-friendly niceness. Afterall, “being a nice woman” is much more important then being a kick-ass racer in the supposed “top rung” of AOW.
The fact that Milka Duno is STILL pretending to be a race driver in this series and there are owners still desperate enough to take her big check, tells you everything you need to know about how weak this sport is.
Sorry, but that is the truth.
March 6th, 2010 at 2:58 am
You miss a major point in why people shouldn’t cry about Graham not having a ride but Milka having one:
Graham was actually offered this exact ride first and he turned it down!!!
Because of this fact, nobody has any right to be upset at Milka for getting this ride. If anything, people should be annoyed at Graham for declining to drive that car in the first place
March 10th, 2010 at 10:29 am
Did Duno ever crash in a victory lap? Vittorio Brambilla did after winning the 1975 Austrian F1 Grand Prix.